You still love each other. You just can't stop having the same fight.
Couples therapy and marriage counseling in Brownsville and the Rio Grande Valley, in person.
It’s the same cycle of fighting over and over again.
You know how this one goes.
One of you says something. The other one hears something slightly different. Within four minutes you are not talking about the calendar anymore, you are in the argument underneath it, the one you have had so many times you could each say the other's lines.
Then it is over. Someone apologizes, or nobody does. You go to bed. Tomorrow is fine. Next Thursday it happens again.
You may not be a couple in crisis but you know something has to change. Right now you are getting things done. You get the kids where they need to be. From the outside you look like people who have it together, and mostly you do.
But somewhere in the last few years you stopped being on the same team. You are not sure when. You just know you miss each other, and neither one of you can figure out how to say it without it turning into the fight.
You may have all tried the communication tips but you are stuck in the same cycle.
You have probably tried a few things. The book. The podcast. The rule about not going to bed angry. Maybe a round of couples counseling somewhere that gave you a worksheet and taught you to say "I feel" instead of "you always."
Some of it helped a little. None of it lasted. That is not because you did not try hard enough, and it is not because one of you is the problem.
It is because the fight is not about what you are fighting about. Underneath it is a much older question, are you there, do I matter to you, am I still someone you are glad you picked, and no communication technique reaches that. You have to actually go there, with someone who knows how to take you there safely.
That is the work I do.
Keely Rodriguez, LPC-S
Provides in person couples therapy in Brownsville and the Rio Grande Valley, using Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) alongside a trauma specialist’s training in EMDR and Brainspotting.
How I work with Couples
Hi, I’m Keely.
Hi, I'm Keely. I'm a Licensed Professional Counselor Supervisor.
I am trained in Emotionally Focused Therapy, which is built on a simple idea: the enemy is not your partner. It is the pattern the two of you fall into when you are both scared and neither one of you can say so.
So in my office we are not choosing sides and we are not keeping score. We slow the fight down until you can both see the shape of it, who reaches, who retreats, how fast it goes, and then we work on what is happening underneath it for each of you.
I am also a trauma specialist. That matters in couples work more than people expect. What one of you learned about love at eight years old is often sitting right in the middle of the argument you had last Tuesday. I know how to work with that.
Where We Start: The Intake Session
Every couple starts with a 75 minute intake and roadmap session. Before we meet, you will each complete the Gottman Relationship Checkup separately and privately.
The Checkup is thorough, and it gives me a clear read on where things actually stand for each of you before you are ever in the room together.
After the first session, each person in the couple with meet with me one on one for 35 minutes to allow me to discuss with you individually about your family history, your experiences in relationships and what you goals are for couples counseling.
Finally we sit down for another 50 minute session. I will tell you what I see, what I think is driving the pattern, and what the work would look like. You will leave with an honest clinical opinion, including if I think you do not need much, or if I think something else needs to happen first.
Most couples meet with me weekly or twice a month for 50 minutes. When there has been a betrayal, or when something bigger is running the show, I will recommend 75 minute sessions instead. We will discuss all the options together and see what is the best fit in terms of session frequency.
Is this the right fit?
This is probably a fit if:
•You have been together long enough to have a real history, and you would like to keep going.
•You keep having the same fight and you are tired of it.
•One or both of you shuts down, and you both hate it.
•Something happened, a betrayal, a breach of trust, and you are trying to decide what comes next.
•You want to actually get somewhere, not collect strategies.
This probably is not the right place right now if:
•There is violence or fear in your relationship. Couples work is not safe when one person cannot speak freely. I will help you find the right support.
•An affair is still going on. That work cannot start until it is over. Not a judgment, it just will not work.
•Addiction is currently running the relationship. That usually needs its own care first, and I can point you toward it.
•You are looking for a therapist who takes insurance. I have a private pay practice.
Where and when couples sessions happen
Couples sessions are held in person at my Brownsville office, serving Brownsville, Harlingen, San Benito, Los Fresnos, and the wider Rio Grande Valley. Couples from McAllen, Edinburg, Mission, Pharr, and Weslaco travel to Brownsville for these sessions all the time.
I do not see couples online. Two people in a room read each other in ways a screen flattens, and in this work that matters.
Couples sessions run mornings, midday, and at 4:30, Monday through Thursday. I do not schedule couples in the evenings or on Saturdays. That is not a scheduling quirk. Couples work asks a lot of all three of us, and I do it when I can bring my whole attention to it. You get a better session for it.
Couples sessions are held at Keely Rodriguez Therapy 1623 Central Blvd, 2nd Floor, Suite 1. Brownsville, TX 78520. (956) 275-3232.
1
Couples Intake Session
(Includes Gottman Relationship Checkup for both partners)
$275
75 Minute Session
2
Couple Individual Sessions
One Time Individual Sessions with Each Partner
$275
75 Minute Session
(35 minutes per partner)
3
Ongoing Couple Session
$200
50 Minute Sessions
Extended Couple Sessions
When there has been a betrayal, or when a couple is struggling with something deeper, I will recommend 75-minute sessions.
$300
75 Minute Session
Why Private Pay for Couples Counseling
Insurance requires therapist to diagnose one of you with a mental health condition in order to cover the work. Relationship distress is not that, and I am not willing to label one of you to make the billing work. Paying directly also means what we do, and how long we do it, stays between the three of us.
Also insurance companies are often unwilling to cover couples therapy and marriage counseling at all.
Frequently Asked Questions
Do you offer couples therapy in Brownsville?
Yes. Couples therapy is held in person at my Brownsville office at 1623 Central Blvd, 2nd Floor, Suite 1, serving Brownsville, Harlingen, San Benito, Los Fresnos, and the wider Rio Grande Valley.
How much does couples therapy cost?
The intake session is $275 for 75 minutes and includes the Gottman Relationship Checkup for both partners. A couples session where I visit with each spouse or partner is the next step to allow me to fully understand what is going on from each person’s perspective. That session is $275 for 75 minutes. Ongoing couples sessions are $200 for 50 minutes. Extended 75-minute sessions are $300 when I recommend them. Payment is per session, with no packages.
How long are couples therapy sessions?
Couples sessions are 50 minutes. The first intake and the second session (35 minute session for each partner) are 75 minutes in total. Some couples need 75 minute ongoing sessions, which I recommend after the second session.
What is Emotionally Focused Therapy?
Emotionally Focused Therapy, or EFT, is an approach to couples work built on attachment science. Rather than teaching communication techniques, it targets the negative cycle a couple falls into and the unmet needs underneath it.
How is Emotionally Focused Therapy different from other couples counseling?
Most couples counseling is skills based. You learn communication formats, repair phrases, and tools for fighting fair, which works well for couples who are basically steady and need better technique. Emotionally Focused Therapy works on the cycle underneath the conflict instead, using attachment science to address what happens between two people before either one speaks. If previous couples work helped in the office but faded within days, the tools were usually fine and the cycle had not changed.
We tried couples counseling before and it did not help. Would this be different?
Often, yes, though I will not promise it. The most common reason couples work stalls is that it stayed at the level of communication technique while the pattern underneath kept running. I work on the pattern itself, and I am a trauma specialist, so if one partner's history is driving part of the cycle I can work with that directly rather than around it. The free consult is where we figure out whether this is a fit.
Do you offer couples therapy online?
No. Couples sessions are in person only, at my Brownsville office. Two people in a room read each other in ways a video call flattens. Individual therapy is available online across Texas.
Do you take insurance for couples therapy?
No. Couples therapy is private pay only. Insurance requires a mental health diagnosis attached to one partner, and relationship distress is not a billable diagnosis.
What happens in the first couples session?
Before we meet, you each complete the Gottman Relationship Checkup separately and privately. I review it and build a roadmap before you are in the room together. The 75-minute session itself is where I tell you what I see, what I think is driving the pattern, and what the work would look like.
How often do couples meet for therapy?
I recommend weekly sessions to start, the first four especially, because that is where the momentum comes from. Some couples move to every other week after that. It works, but does take longer.
Do you work with couples after an affair?
Yes, once the affair has ended. Betrayal recovery is part of my practice and builds on my work as a trauma specialist. If an affair is still going on, couples work cannot start until it is over.
When are couples appointments available?
Couples sessions are scheduled mornings, midday, and at 4:30 p.m., Monday through Thursday.
If you read the top of this page and thought that is us, that is usually a good sign. It means the pattern is nameable, and nameable patterns can change.
The consult is fifteen minutes, it is free, and it is not therapy. It is a conversation about whether this is a fit. Either of you can be on the call, or both.
